It’s confession time. My skin is as pale and cold as refrigerated milk. The bags under my eyes are the color of blueberries. My sense of smell is superhuman when it comes to detecting chocolate. I can outpace a cheetah when I’m late for class. Occasionally, I even glitter in the sun.
No, I’m not a lame variation on Edward Cullen, but I am nocturnal. I live off of the lifeblood of our information driven society: the internet. I would argue that I’m a non-traditional vampire, an anomaly in the realm of supernatural beings. As a member of that unearthly community, I urge you to join me. In other words, you should try staying up well into the night—I’m talking witching hour and beyond. You might be pleasantly surprised.
Don’t misunderstand me; I’m not encouraging a habit of late bedtimes. Usually, being awake at 2 AM doesn't bode well on school nights. I can hardly function in class when I have fewer than seven hours of sleep in my system. In the absence of late night panic attacks over coursework and school, though, that bleary post-midnight haze creates a unique pocket of calm. Time stops. I can convince myself that I’m the only waking person in my world. I can relax.
Initially, the urge to crawl into bed is overwhelming, but this exhaustion is soon replaced with meditative, laser like focus. Barriers break down and my mind is free to map the unexplored terrain of my consciousness. Ideas that had been stewing in the deep waters of my brain float to the surface. The first draft of my common app essay, poems, and this blog post have all emerged from those depths. Burrowing deep into the night, I am no longer boxed in by the constraints I feel in the harsh light of day. I am free to think, free to breathe, free to act without fear of failure, expectation, responsibility.
Passing this time with friends can be similarly rewarding. After midnight, we exist in a cocoon of mutual understanding. Mental filters disintegrate, social obligations are null and void. In the dark, we are no longer people. We are voices, hushed, confiding, pleading to be heard. We no longer don our masks, and whether or not we may come to regret it, we reveal layers of ourselves that we usually keep under wraps.
Humans are wired to awaken at dawn and go to sleep at dusk. I should probably avoid manipulating my biological clock by staying up late, and I always kick myself for doing so in the morning. But in the dead of night, swaddled in my 2 AM cocoon, I know I would atrophy without those late hours to myself. No time of day could ever replicate the boundless hush of night.
I recently stayed up past 1 AM, which is a big deal for me since (as my friends know) I am usually asleep by my self-enforced bed time at 10 PM. I really love your description because it really encapsulates the aura at this time. I too require eight hours of sleep to function in the morning, so I don't normally stay up this late during the week. Occasionally, however, I agree that it's nice to be awake when no one else is.
ReplyDeleteThis was a really well written post. I loved the introduction, it was very captivating, and then I was really interested throughout the whole post. I especially enjoyed the line "The first draft of my common app essay, poems, and this blog post have all emerged from those depths," just because I thought the way you referred to the night time as a "depth" really felt perfect to me. This was great and I related to it-- I too often feel like the night hours make it seem like time has stopped, even for just a little.
ReplyDeleteAlthough I usually keep it to the weekends, I agree that there's a certain kind of warmth to staying up to the am. Somehow your description of all the little social pressures falling away at night, freeing you to really get things done, struck me as very accurate. It's comforting to steal some time out of your busy schedule to do the things you actually want to. While I was reading this I found myself nodding along with pretty much everything you said. (Also, I could point out how good some of your phrasing is, but I don't think you really need it.)
ReplyDeleteI feel like time goes by faster at night, though I don't know if that is because at night I'm either really relaxed or frantically working. Like you, I used to stay up real late a lot of the night. However, I'm finding myself not being able to stay up as late anymore (no energy left haha). I really liked how you captured the essence of the night and why you stay up at night. I could related to most of your points and I think you did a great job of illustrating your points.
ReplyDeleteI love the language in this post! It was so fun to read, and I totally agree with you! I'm nocturnal too, and I understand you. Eventually my fatigue and urge to sleep turns into an urge to do my homework and get an A. Well, first my urge to sleep turns into an urge to watch Netflix. Then, an hour later, I realize how important it is to finish my homework. Everything about nighttime is perfect for being productive. There's peace, quiet, comfort, and freedom. Nighttime is the best.
ReplyDeleteOnly you can make sleep deprivation sound this good. I never plan to stay up late, but then one thing leads to another and suddenly it's ridiculously late (usually it's BuzzFeed, thanks to you). I really like how quite my house gets at night, no bothersome parents or siblings.
ReplyDeleteI love staying up late because I get to be alone. The rest of my family is usually in bed by 10, so I usually get a couple hours of being left alone in a quiet house, which is the best thing ever. I also find that once I get beyond the drowsy stage that comes around 11, I am much more productive and focused. The more pressure I have, the better I work. The problem is, I sometimes succumb to the 11 pm sleepiness. I've often fallen asleep while doing reading for English or History in bed, only to awake in the middle of the night, confused about why my light is on or why I'm laying on an uncomfortable book. But most of the time, I see the night as the best time for working.
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